Even though I already knew, I had to go in for my beta on Monday. It took a little time before o felt like I could talk about it, let alone write. Getting that call back, hearing my nurse say it didn't happen this time...ugh. That was rough.
Oddly, I'm glad I tested at home and found out before beta day. Had I waited, I'd have found out for the first time at work. How hard would that have been? I don't even want to know. The hardest part was telling the hubs. I called him because we were both at work. He was coming back from booking a prisoner (he's a copper) and pulled over to talk.
If you've never heard a quiver in the voice of the person you love, let me tell you....it's enough to make you burst into tears yourself. Listening to him, feeling his feeling and sharing mine with him - though it wasn't something I wanted to have to share, it reminded me yet again how right I was to pick this one man.
We held it together though, just sitting on the phone listening to one another breath. We've had a little time to digest and I think we're doing ok. We're not ready to see the RE for our "WTF" appointment, but soon maybe. Right now, we're just trying to get back to being us. Each of us together, we've missed just being one another's lobster.